Copyright – Beth Carter
“We’ve built a car!” they had sung. It must have been years, but the time we passed together made them fly. We flew together. Everywhere we went people would look, stare, laugh. But we never minded, we had each other and we were happy.
I used to flatter myself that I wasn’t just an object to them. I was loved. I held memories in my possession, beautiful instances in life that I clutched within me, not letting them flash by. And they loved me for it.
Or so I thought. But now here I am, forgotten, betrayed, ridiculed and disillusioned.
—
Every Wednesday I visit Friday Fictioneers and scroll down as fast as my slow internet connection would let me. Anticipation rises within me as the picture for the week comes closer. Then I see it. I gasp. Then stare at it for long minutes. I sit silent and I ponder. The little story then starts to bud, tickling my imagination with shallow roots that grown longer as the day passes…
I’m tired, forgive me! I hope you like this one.
Sandra's scribbles 
Oh, nice…first I thought it was a parent talking, then realized it was the car. But it could read as a parent who had the car with the children and now is no longer cared for. I like the ambiguity (or maybe I’m just tired, too! ) 🙂
It wasn’t meant to be ambiguous. The cetainty of who the character is was supposed to comeout in the last sentence and the title. Then again, I was very tired too when I wrote so I will absolutely not blame you for your interpretation; I’ll do better next time (I hope).
Your interpretation came through clearly. However, when I skimmed at first, I thought of the parent and realized later I still might possibly maybe squeeze that interpretation if I really worked at it. It was well-written. But sometimes other interpretations are possible even in the best writing and that’s not necessarily bad. This time it was just me being in a hurry.
Nice twist to have the protagonist the car. Good job.
Thank you 🙂
I adore this!
Hehe 🙂 thank you
The Car’s Voice… nice job.
Thanks 🙂
great writing from the car’s pov. really sad…
Thank you; I always imagine what would objects feel when we just discard them in the trash. May be I’m a tad too sensitive!
That’s an interesting take. Like Toy Story, such stories are always slightly tragic. It makes me want to go hug my scooter. 🙂
I know exactly how you feel!
Ah..you caught human nature just right there, more than in one way…and yes, the car a substitute for a couple of things that come to mind..very clever indeed…
Thanks a lot 🙂
Very sad; I’m a sucker for anthropomorphic stories. You should see me when I part with my cars. Very well done.
You should see me when my car gets me through tight spots (flooded areas or the like), I pat the dashboard and thank her!
Sad, sad, sad… I enjoyed that very much..
I always feel so sad for inanimate objects, once loved, now forgotten.. 😉
So do I! Thank you for stopping by.
I like it. I like your outro as well 🙂
Thank you 🙂
Not forgotten at all! Here we all are writing stories about it! Great little story 🙂
Oh but think of all those poor souls in the scrap heap; this was a lucky one!
Dear Sandra,
Poignant story. I’m one of those who gets attached to my cars. Your story put me in mind of a favorite David Wilcox song. click the link to hear it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tCbCkOBdt4
Shalom,
Rochelle
I had never heard this song before abd that is one bueautiful song, the lyrics are so sad!
The other half of that is: if cars could talk and tell all that went on inside them…wow.
Scott
http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/02/27/friday-fictioneers-312013-xxxx-genre-humorous/
Oh my, that would be scary; imagine how many examplary citizens would lose their reputation!
Precisely, not to mention the other ones.
well done. good to see you. something to think about – in this line: “…in my possession; beautiful instances in…” that semicolon after “possession” should really be a comma. up to you though.
Amended. I am still trying to master that semicolon. Punctuation will be the end of me! Thank you Rich.
glad to help.
Ah the personification! I was thinking in the first paragraph it was one of the owners of the car, but then i realized in the second it was the car’s story. Can’t you just imagine if all the things in our life could talk what stories they might tell.
Oh my goodness, how scary would that be! Half the stuff I own would report me to the Objects Protection services for sure!
Oh I agree. i was thinking about the tales of how we act in the privacy of our own home.
I love that the story is told from the car’s point of view.
I enjoyed thinking like a car; I’ll try this again some other time.
Awww…poor old car. You know old cars have feelings too!
Cars are people too!
Very nice, of course a car like that has its own voice. 🙂
I like to think so.
Love this POV!
Thanks, I’m glad you did 🙂
The car’s perspective! Good thinking!
This made an interesting read.
Thank you Parul
To be discarded. If cars had a thought I wonder if this is what they would think once they were left to sit. Great take on the picture.
The two words that came to mind after I read this were “bittersweet” and “quaint” I understand the first but not the second unless I picked up on some part of the car’s personality or I just identified with the car? I don’t know. Regardless, you made me feel something and that means good writing in my book.
Hehe 🙂 thanks a lot Michael, you’re kind to say so.