Raining Rebels

Trifecta entry:

Fall rain!

Clean our souls from this evil.

Wash our cobblestones clear of blood,

Rinse away our memories,

Of heads rolling, fear.

Let us only remember

From this rebellion;

The price we paid to be free.


Trifecta asked for 33 words plus another 3; rain, remember, rebellion.  This week I am very late with my entry; so I had more time to think.   But, unfortunately, instead of coming up with the perfect post, I came up with two (I hope) okay ones.  The second is the following;  It is not up for the Trficeta challenge of course, but since I wrote it, I thought I’ll give it to you as well.

‘Remember, remember, the fifth of November.’

‘Stop that!’

‘C’mon we have the masks.’

‘This ain’t a rebellion, fuckhead.’

‘Geesh.  Lighten up!’

‘Only if all goes well….Good, rain!  It’ll wash off our tracks.  Ready?…HANDS UP this is a robbery!’


29 comments on “Raining Rebels

  1. Suzanne says:

    Love them both Sandra! The first one is so haunting and sombre — and the second made me laugh out loud. I love your diversity!

  2. barbara says:

    remember . . . or repeat in the forgetting

  3. Cameron says:

    Like Suzanne above, I thought the first one haunting, very French Revolution, and the second pretty funny. Of course, it could just be because calling someone “fuckhead” just makes me laugh.

    Arrived via Trifecta.

    • Sandra says:

      I’m happy; the French Revolutions was what I was thinking of when I wrote this. I even had allusions to Liberty, equality and fraternity. But the 33 word limit is a bitch.

  4. Gina says:

    The use of “fuckhead” is an easy way to get a chuckle out of me but perfect in use during a bumbling robbery.

    The first/original entry was haunting.

  5. deanabo says:

    Both of these are really good!

  6. Donetta says:

    This was amazing. Wonderful on both.

  7. The first reminds of Henry the VIII, the second reminds me of Heath Ledger in the Joker – loved both versions.

  8. Draug419 says:

    Both of them are awesome. I cried with the first and laughed with the second (:

  9. Lori Wise says:

    I agree with everyone here. I, too, cracked up at the fuckhead comment. Too funny 🙂

  10. Lumdog says:

    Great descriptive words of the ravages of war.

    • Sandra says:

      Thank you Lumdog. I really liked yours too, but I have a problem and I can’t comment on non-Wordpress blogs, so I thought I’d tell you from here.

  11. nessa1313 says:

    I like them both. The first is so very French Revolution with heads rolling.

  12. atrm61 says:

    Great imagery in the first one & a powerful lesson,loved it:-)

  13. kymminbarcelona says:

    Robespierre and Guy Fawkes in 66 words! 1st one was brutal, but gorgeous.

  14. I always go for the funny. The second one was my fav. The first one would be a good patriotic verse. http://annbennett2.blogspot.com

  15. That first one is really good.

  16. Kir Piccini says:

    that first one is such a Les Miserables moment, I adored it.

    • Sandra says:

      Yeah, you kind of imagine Hugh Jackman praying to the rain, while drops filter through his clothes. His white shirt, soon wet, sticks to his abs …(Let me stop here. I got a little carried away there, sorry!)

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