Pay Back

‘Why am I here?’

‘Ha! Hear that Sandro?’ said Golden Grimaldi to the other man.  ‘He doesn’t know why he’s here.’

Sandro guffawed and tugged on the rope.

When Eugene opened his eyes to the swaying, grey, concrete walls and the blaring light from the one halogen tube overhead, he had struggled; the imposing sight of Golden Grimaldi standing with his arms crossed had made his blood curdle.  But now, with his limbs tied to the chair as they were, Eugene couldn’t do much except try to bullshit his way out of this.

‘I paid you back… to the last cent!’

‘That you did Genie boy.  It is the how of it that’s brought you here.’

‘The how? What d’you mean?’

‘Let me refresh your memory.’

Golden Grimaldi pulled up a chair, turned its back to Eugene, and straddled it.  His casual air forced slugs of sweat out of Eugene’s pores.

‘The day you paid me what was mine, I was with five of my men at a booth in my pub.  “Here’s your dough,” you told me. “Take it you bastard.” Do you remember that Eugene? Calling me the B word in front of my men, on my own property?  But that wasn’t all, was it?  You opened the plastic bag and let my dough rain on my head.”

The recollection brought a smile to Eugene’s lips.  He couldn’t help it.  The triumph of the moment; paying back this fucker everything he owed him, after his thugs had almost ruined his life, had been such a load off his shoulders.

‘You insulted me that day, Genie boy.  And no one insults Golden Grimaldi without paying for it. Sandro…now!’

Sandro went to the far shadowy corner of the garage and it was then that Eugene noticed a lumpy sack.  And the sack was moving.

Without tearing his gaze away from Eugene’s face, Grimaldi spoke. ‘Sandro, make it rain.’

The last thing Eugene saw were red eyes and teeth.  Then the rats ate his face.

This is my response to Trifecta’s challenge where the word is Rain:

I hope I used the word correctly!

32 comments on “Pay Back

  1. “Sandro”?! My my..!! As always, so well-written and full of atmosphere!

  2. steph says:

    Yeesh… I’m heading off to bed in a couple of hours. I hope that’s not the last image I see as I drift off. Well done atmospheric piece. Wow, that is retribution.

  3. Draug419 says:

    lmfao That last line made me crack up. I have a dark sense of humor (: Awesome entry!

  4. Hmm The Godfather seems….rather tame now… 🙂

  5. kymminbarcelona says:

    Yuk. Don’t screw with the mafia. You’ll never win.

  6. lumdog says:

    I love the dialogue and the way you slowly developed this story. A real twist with the rat thing. Great job on this piece.

  7. atrm61 says:

    What a great build up & a smooth continuation too!Loved it Sandra & the horrific ending reminded me of of one of my fav authors who just died last month-James Herbert:-)

  8. Raining rats – original and ironic.

  9. jannatwrites says:

    Aack! Dang, I wasn’t expecting that ending. Rats freak me out!

  10. I love your responses to our prompts. This is really great.

  11. no that’s a bad day

  12. Brian Benoit says:

    Yikes! Face-eating rats are the worst. I loved the characters you created, and Golden Grimaldi’s creepy coolness.

    • Sandra says:

      Agreed; face eating rats are right up there in my list of things I do not want to be stuck in a room with. Thanks for your comment Brian.

  13. great use of the prompt – in a horrible, creepy way

  14. ann bennett says:

    who have you been hanging with to write this grisly piece. Well done.

    • Sandra says:

      Lol! I was actually practicing for a crime novel I’m trying to conjure…and from the response I got from this post I’m guessing that I am close to the right track! Thanks a lot for your comment Ann.

  15. That last sentence was a bit of a blungeon; not sure whether to laugh or cringe. 🙂 Don’t mess with Grimaldi, apparently.

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